If I were a television character, what would my story be? Would I be the hero? The sidekick? The love interest? The comic relief? The deadpan snarker? Would my story be a redemption tale, a fall from grace, a bildungsroman? What would my genre be? Comedy? Drama? Sci-fi? What would the title be? Who would star and guest-star? What would be the most important tropes to keep popping up?