I don't often sit back and think about Xander. It's not that I hate him, but he's not the character that interests me the most.

I personally saw him as the writer's self insert. Which I don't think is completely bad a thing.

It seemed to me that Xander's behavior throughout the whole show was right on for him. I didn't like all of what he was, but he made sense.

Of course he isn't going to like vampires. Like you said, he had two friends in the beginning, and one of them one was killed by a vampire. When you only have a couple of friends, you cherish them and are usually closer to them than a person who has many friends.

He grudgingly let his guard down with Angel and that didn't end well.

I loved Xander with Cordelia. That's like the ultimate geek guy's dream and it was fun to watch.

I did not like how he treated Anya. Except for one scene, I never got the feeling that Xander really cared for Anya. It was like she was just there, she was clingy and he went with the flow. I don't just blame Xander for that though. Anya let it happen.

I think you are right about the building up and knocking down of the character. This just made him seem real. Like someone you might meet on the street or on a construction site.

I don't read the comics, so I have no idea what's going on there. But I will say that the way they are drawing him makes me more interested in him. He looks strong and confident and slightly angry. That I like.